Remembrance

I felt like writing another post about something that I probably don't talk enough about. To the left is a picture of a good friend of mine. I think she was 13 here. Young, aspiring to go to college and become a lawyer. We had talks of getting married and having families that lived right next to each other. Our kids would grow up together and be the best of friends. How young we were. To think that we would be able to do that.

It has now been 8 years since she passed. Halloween was her anniversary. I told myself that I was going to write a letter to her mom. To tell her how I had not forgotten and that I still think of her. I stayed up the other night, talking with Frank about it. How much guilt I have about how long I go and not even think of her. That my life just carries on like nothing is missing. About how much I really miss her. How alone I felt when she left us and how much I still feel alone. The other night was the first time I had cried in a long time about this. Then right now, as I type this. She really was my best friend. I had never experienced a loss in my life. After Amber passed, my grandfather died about 2 months later. Needless to say it was a rough year for me. She was such a beautiful person. Always caring and always appreciative of her friends and family. I was a really bad influence on her. I am the one who helped her pick up smoking. I lost my virginity and made her sit in there with me because I was soooo afraid. Amber always helped me to keep my head above water though. About 1 week before she died there were 2 girls that showed up at my house to basically beat her and I up. She called the cops and they ran off scared. I remember about 2 weeks after her funeral I saw the 2 girls and they said they were sorry about what happened. Where the f*&$ do they get off thinking it was even ok to talk to me? I told them they should have been sorry 3 weeks ago and flipped them off. Kids in High School can be so mean.


After all this her sister and I became really good friends. Brandy and I did everything together. I really miss talking with her. We got into a lot of trouble, but we managed to stay friends until I left and moved to Las Vegas. I haven't spoken with her in about 4 years. These pictures are of Brandy and I about 6 years ago. Her and Amber looked a lot alike. Wonder if maybe thats why we hung out.Well, that's about all. I guess this post is mostly to help me not forget. To remember what a beautiful person Amber was and to pass the message that drinking and driving is NEVER ok and that it takes lives everyday. Young beautiful people like Amber die everyday because someone gets behind the wheel drunk. That the peoples lives you put at risk is someone's daughter, a mother, a son, a father, an uncle, an aunt, etc...